(compilation video c 1988)

The video starts with a black & white scene with the band plus Gimpo slumped on a sofa watching the TV. On the TV is a crap advert featuring Bob demonstrating the "Hairy Thing - 21 day money back guarantee hair replacement course". The various band members are not particularly interested in the TV ; rolling ciggies, eating cold baked beans, falling asleep, staring madly (Gimpo!), lying crashed out with a guitar and, in Zode's case, loading a gun. As dramatic events unfold on the TV and Bob grows a full mane of hair, Zodiac puts a bullet in the TV and into Bob's forehead.

segues into...

'Last Words', some sort of chat show scenario with Slam Thunderhide being interviewed as Jesus. Before the interview begins "Jesus" performs a miracle on the near-sighted, be-spectacled interviewer by curing his poor eye-sight. "I like to start the show with a bit of a bang" explains 'Jesus'. As it turns out, Jesus' latest project is apparently working with a rock n' roll band, and the devil doesn't have all the good tunes it turns out. He then introduces the bands latest video which turns out to be...

When Cobalt launches into the song's guitar solo, his guitar shoots bolts of white energy from its end (per-leese!!) which hit the girls turning them into leather-clad, whip-cracking S&M babes! Zodiac then produces lightning from his fingers which draws the girls to the band, so they can clutch and paw them, much to their delight!

Just at this point the door to the dormitory opens and three school ma'ams appear in the doorway looking extremely pissed off. Zodiac's eyes glow red and all three heads explode! Problem solved. The girls climb up onto the ATV with the band and begin to undress Zode and generally behave badly. Everyone is then teleported back to the spaceship where they disappear back into the sky. Before departing however, Zode presses a big red button which sends a red laser bolt down to the school destroying it.

Cheap special effects and hammy camera play-acting all amount to a hilarious video full of cliché which is full of clichés. Directed by Adrian Edmunson of Comic Strip and Young Ones fame.

segues back into...

'Last Words' where the interviewer asks Jesus which film, that was made about Him, was his favourite. Jesus, rather bizarrely, answers "The one with John Wayne in it".

Cobalt changes channels on the TV...

There is some kind of "Right To Reply" video box thing on, with a guy called Terry Nash complaining about Channel 4 subjecting him and his 5 year old child to the horrors of the video to "Backseat Education". He describes the leather-clad hoodlums and their leader, Mr. Zodiac Timewarp, as being appalling subject matter for Channel 4.

"Come on Channel 4", he says "this just isn't good enough".

segues into...

The game is nearly over and both sides are raising the stakes on the final hand. Zodiac pushes forward a wedge of cash and the scarred guy places a priceless ancestral ring atop the money. Zodiac isn't impressed with this trinket and suggests the man's daughter would be an acceptable bet, much to the outrage of all (except Zodiac) present. The man reluctantly agrees and places his hand down, a full house. Zodiac counts out 4 aces and puts his final card on top, face down. This final card turns out to be an additional Ace of Spades! However Zodiac has already left with the cash, the ring and the girl!

Outside the intro riff to "Backseat Education" kicks in and Zodiac tears of his white suit to reveal his familiar leather n' fur garb. He introduces the girl to the Love Reaction who are slouching in the back of a spray-painted American convertible. Zodiac and companion get in, much to the distaste of the girl, and the car wheelspins off just as the girl's irate father and his cronies burst out of the door. They jump in a car and give chase.

Much romping in the convertible ensues and we see the guys in the chasing car changing into red ninja outfits (you can see where this is going can't you!)

The band crash their car and when the ninjas turn up a stand-off ensues with the ninjas on one side, armed with samurai swords, and the band on the other side, armed with...swords drawn from guitars and using cymbals as shields!

A battle starts and most of the ninja are dispatched in a variety of ways by our heroes. Meanwhile, the girl sneaks away from the crashed car and turns into this oriental swordswoman who swings her sword in anger at Zodiac, who just stands there staring at the camera looking cool, calm and collected.

This video uses every cheesy Japanese action-movie cliché and features more of those crap special effects. It is quite funny in places - check out Cobalt's guitar solo on the bonnet of the car...

segues into...

Some sort of American TV preacher called "The Reverend Mindwarp from the Electric Temple of the Church of the Love Reaction" preaching, very enthusiastically, straight to camera and to a live studio audience. It is of course Zodiac dressed up in a smart black suit complete with bootlace tie and cowboy hat, and the audience consist of various band members, Gimpo and others.

The Reverend then proceeds to warn us of the 'temptation of fornication, sin and Satan' citing drugs and alcohol as the main offenders. He can save our souls, however, for the amazing price of $50 per week. The legitimacy of his claims his proven when he yanks Gimpo out of the studio audience and proceeds to wax lyrical on his remarkable recovery and reformation. Gimpo used to 'spill his seed' everywhere but is now a 'good Christian boy'. He paid his $50 and, now, can't even get a hard-on! Apparently, as the Reverend screams at us, the "High Priest of Love" will save us...

This is basically a scrapbook video of live footage of the band onstage in various dives. It also features shots of punks and rockers in a busy high street somewhere, aswell as shots of the crowd at various gigs. Tell me if I'm going mad, but I swear that you can see Lofty from Eastenders in the crowd near the end of the track! He's only on-screen for about a second, but the glasses and the spiky blond hair are a dead-ringer...

This is a pretty uninspired video, with the video footage not in synch with the music, but it's pretty funny to see what some of the band used to wear onstage and to witness Zodiac's stage presence.

segues into...

A police interrogation. Cobalt is getting forcibly asked where the Planet Girl is by a mad f*cker of a cop. Cobalt is head-butted, has a gun shoved in his bollocks and is pistol-whipped. "Where the f*ck is the Planet Girl?" demands the homicidal cop. A battered and bloodied Cobalt can only groan in dismay...

segues into...

The song kicks in and all of the band are onstage playing to a packed out club. Meanwhile outside the venue, a beautiful girl in a silver space-babe outfit pulls up in a chauffeur-driven limo. She heads inside.

While the band are jumping about onstage, the Planet Girl (for it is she) makes her way through the heaving throng to get a closer look. She glows brightly amongst the sea of black leather jackets and catches Zodiac's eye. Zodiac is now singing directly to her and the two of them lock gazes. The Planet Girl is clearly intoxicated (with something...) and as the songs dying chords ring out they touch hands across the crowd. As a pulsating red heart pops into a million pieces on the screen, we know they're in love. Aah...

segues into...

"The Campfire Club - Part 2". This is some sort of American country & western music show, featuring bands playing to a live studio audience. A very camp cowboy compere introduces our heroes as "Randy Mindwarp & The Love Rich Boys". The band are sitting on some hay bales and are decked out in check shirts, cowboy hats and are sporting nice shiny new guitars instead of the familiar 'Sleazegrinder' and 'Electric Gestapo'.

There follows many changes of channel on the TV, and we see brief snippets of everything we've seen so far. The last shot is of the video to "Prime Mover" with Zodiac singing the breakdown part :

"Priiiiiiimme...."

(channel changed back to "The Campfire Club")

"...Mooveerrr!" What we now see is 'Randy Mindwarp & The Love Rich Boys' doing a Country & Western version of "Prime Mover", possibly the funniest moment on the entire video. As the closing credits roll, the camera pans around the various band members we get to hear a couple of choruses of this new version. Sung with a Texas drawl and all Johnny Cash-ed up it's a superb way to end the video. The credits introduce the band and highlight special appearances by 'Evil Bastard', 'Gimpo', and 'Julies Gerbils'.

"Sleazeprinder" only lasts about 20 minutes but is great fun and should be viewed (and was most certainly filmed) with tongue firmly planted in cheek. It captures Zodiac Mindwarp & The Love Reaction at the height of their commercial success and is a great companion to the album "Tattooed Beat Messiah".